Posted @withrepost • @drjanellelenhoff . . . Imagine the following scenario. You’re at a friends house for a get together. Your friend has prepared an assortment of different snacks ranging from veggies, fruits, and cheeses to cookies and cakes . . . If you have restrained yourself from eating foods like cookies and cakes, at this party, you might feel “unable to stop eating” these foods. You may tell yourself “I have no self control or willpower!” FALSE. . . . This is not an issue of a lack of self control or willpower. Furthermore you are not addicted to these sweet foods. YOU ARE IN A STATE OF DEPRIVATION due to RESTRAINED EATING (aka depriving yourself and not allowing yourself to eat certain foods). This makes these foods seem increasingly salient and since you don’t typically “allow” yourself to have them, this get together seems like YOUR ONLY CHANCE! MUST EAT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE BEFORE THE DEPRIVATION RESUMES!!! . . . Individuals who truly know they have UNCONDITIONAL PERMISSION TO EAT COOKIES, CAKES, and all the foods, ANYTIME do not have an emotionally charged experience with foods. They approach the foods with emotional neutrality and decide “do I want this? Does this sound good right now?” They know they can have this food in question whenever they want it WITHOUT guilt or shame . . . If this resonates with you, practice giving yourself permission to enjoy the foods you like at time where you’re not overly hungry, tired or vulnerable (aka stressed, lonely, bored etc). Let go of any guilt, judgment or shame. You are doing nothing wrong and are not a ‘bad’, weak, or flawed person for enjoying food. FOOD IS NOT A MORAL ISSUE . . . All foods fit. Guilt, judgment and shame DO NOT FIT . . . #intuitiveeating#intuitiveeatingofficial#haes#healthateverysize#mentalhealth#edfam#edrecovery#eatingdisorder#eatingdisorderrecovery#dietculture#nondiet#antidiet#nourish#nourishnotpunish#allfoodsfit#bodypositive#bopo
Oh hey Instagram!! I missed this so dearly! I took a break from posting to focus on my family. My grandmother passed and I dropped everything to get home and help my family through it. With that I also dropped my focus on myself and haven’t been moving my body and overeating. So this week we devised a plan: meals prepped, new workout split, and utilizing My Fitness Pal to track what I’m eating and keep me accountable! First workout in three weeks, wasn’t the best but I kept my promise to myself that I would go and that’s what counts. Happy Tuesday people!
5 healthy living tips that have nothing to do with food:⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 1. Listen to your body. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ When it aches, there is usually a reason. If you feel rundown, it's because you likely are. If you feel tension or apprehensive about a situation, pay attention to that. Our body tries to send us messages all the time, but it is our job to truly listen to them and not just 'push past them'.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 2. Laugh often. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Laughter is truly medicine for the soul and one of the best stress relievers possible (and it's all natural!). Stress can cause a mess!⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 3. What you put on your skin can be just as important as what you eat. We absorb a lot through our skin so consider the quality of your makeup, shampoo, and lotions.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 4. Learn to release negative emotions. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Bottling things up, burying emotions down deep, trying to just gloss over your feelings - doesn't work. If you don't truly release the anger, frustration, sadness, etc then it will stay held in your body and absorbed by your muscles and blood stream. Develop a health processing system for your emotions and a structure of support. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 5. Respect your boundaries. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Boundaries with your body. Boundaries with your time. Boundaries with your money. Boundaries with who you give your attention to. Respecting your boundaries helps to protect your sacred space, your body, your mind, your energy.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Which one will you commit to applying to your life this week?⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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🦋Being the nice girl, following the rules, making everyone around you happy, getting good grades, seeming like you have everything together. Do you resonate? This was a life I lived for quite a few years until recently. I thought that in order to be accepted & liked I needed to be extra nice, & couldn’t disagree or make conflict. I followed the rules to a T & hardly ever got into trouble. I started to make up rules for myself I had to follow in order to feel like I was in control of everything indulging rules with food, exercise, & allowing myself to have fun in life. Honestly, this was not a good way to live. Following the path well traveled & living a life by the rule book might have served me at one point. But now I am like nahhhh. ✨So I have started to let go of my rules & do the thing that will bring me the most joy. Life dosent always have to be about doing the best or right thing. Sometimes you need to take the funner route & do the thing that will bring you the most happiness. 🌻Learning to be little wild in my life has been so healing & freeing for me in so many ways. Your life is meant to be lived including - making mistakes, not being perfect & not always being the “good girl”. ➡️If this is you - it’s time to let your wild side out. Having trouble starting? Look at where you have made up rules in your life. Do you actually have to follow them or are they more of a way to try & control & live life small? . . . . #selflove#mountaingirls#womenwhohike#edrecovery#loveyourself#staywild#womenempowerment#empowerment#mindfulness#confidence#sheisnotlost#wildernessculture#lifeisgood#dietculture#foodfreedom#inspire#intuativeeating#exercise#health#nourishnotpunish#yoga#flowerchild
If you weigh yourself, you'll likely be obsessed with your weight. In a world that puts a lot of pressure on you to be a certain size, it's important for you to know that can make the choice to put your time and energy into other things instead of monitoring your weight. I'd invite you to try it and see how much more free your mind feels 💛
Hey hi hello friends! I feel, inside of me I know, I need a short social media break right now. It would do good for me. Everything is okay, I just feel a bit stuck inside and in my life overall. I still feel quite pleasant, but I know I can and I want feel & be more. Just wanted to let you know. Loads of courage 💛 & see you soon
Breakfast this morning was a banger 😍 ------------------------------------------ It’s so weird, on reflecting on how I was a few months ago, the concept of even a tiny bowl of cereal sent me reeling. I remember my dietician suggesting it on my refeeding mealplan and I told her with tears in my eyes that I hadn’t had cereal for so long and then I broke down telling her I was so overwhelmed at the concept of all these foods that I so dearly want but just... couldn’t ? Carbohydrates were my biggest fear. ------------------------------------------ I remember not allowing myself more than a teaspoon of peanut butter. I remember not having anything apart from unsweetened yogurt. I remember the concept of coming down for breakfast without all my exercise routines and pouring myself a huge ass bowl of cereal and eating a chocolate pot and unmeasured milk and then eating thick and delicious peanut butter by the tablespoon was ABSOLUTELY LUDICROUS. There was nothing more I wanted to do, however I just couldn’t. I was so trapped. So dark. So stuck. ------------------------------------------ And here I am, eating double servings of cereal, grabbing extra peanut butter from the jar, delving into all these new delicious foods I haven’t allowed myself to even think of for so long. Not exercising, resting and healing and repairing, not using these fucked up behaviours, not having the burden of my OCD routines hanging over my head like a thread and eating ALL THE FUCKING PEANUT BUTTER. And ALL THE FUCKING CARBS. Every damn meal. ------------------------------------------ And not only that. But actually getting my life back, seeing friends, breaking routines, preparing for the next couple of weeks before starting work experience again. Eating in different places for the first time in years. ------------------------------------------ Heck, when my relapse thoughts strike, I need to realise just how much more I’m gaining than weight. I’m gaining normality back. My
I keep idolising my ed. How I felt happier when I didn’t eat, how my body looked so much better starving than it is now, and how my life was better. But that’s not the truth. The truth is that my life SUCKED. And I have to remind myself of that all the time. I’m still struggling, but it’s slowly getting better, and my life now is so much more than it has ever been before. And I truly believe that I’m starting to live for real. Starting to appreciate life for what it is. Stop being afraid of it. I’m starting to live rather than just being alive, and it’s so wonderful. I still have to fight my mind every day, but knowing that I can have the energy to walk up the stairs, mess around with my brother, play with my dogs, feel happy. That’s worth everything! Not limiting my life to the tiny box of an eating disorder. I’m alive, and I am truly happy. Life will have its ups and downs, but I’m okay with that. The moment I’m living in is really all that matters, and right now it’s a feeling of happiness that I haven’t been experiencing for a LONG time. This is a picture of me being genuinely happy, enjoying the sun, enjoying my life. Take care of yourselves❤️
Lunch. Intuitive eating to me means eating IN joy. A joyous state. I take time to check in with my feelings before I eat (or at least I try). If I’m stressed or angry or anxious I try not to eat. Or if I do eat in those states I repeat to myself “I cannot yet my comfort from food. I can get my comfort from feeling my feelings and connecting to the deepest part of me”. It has helped me so much to start seeing food as fuel. I enjoy it, I love the taste of all kinds of food and I can enjoy that, while still not using it as a coping mechanism to avoid trauma and pain. Intuitive eating means I can eat the chocolate. And I can eat it without shame or guilt. I can eat with and in JOY. That alone has taken the power out of my addiction. I’m so excited for the future. It’s ALL mine! #fitmom#plussizefitness#fatlete#intuitiveeating#joyofeating#nourishnotpunish#bodypositive#loveyourbody#fuelyourbody#emotionalbraintraining#antidiet#fuckdietculture#workoutfuel#postworkoutmeal
I'm not going be the person that tells you that you have to work out. But I will tell you about how movement is benefitting my life, and how it hasn't always been that way. When I was chasing weight loss I was using exercise as a way to "balance" my food intake. Exercise became the way I felt I could make up for my binges. As well as if I worked "hard enough" I would hopefully lose some weight. After stating the healing from disordered eating and learning about IE and HAES, I realized that exercise had also become very disordered for me. So, I decided to take a break from exercise entirely. I'll be honest with you, at first, this brought up a ton of fear. The underlying one was that if I stopped exercising I would gain an uncontrollable amount of weight. I had to get real honest about what was underneath those fears of gaining weight. I learned what I was really afraid of was not feeling good enough or lovable. I had then the opportunity to dig into my own fears around self-worth and start to heal those parts of myself. It always goes deeper than just the fear of weight gain. Take the time to uncover what it is you are really afraid of so that you can heal it from the root. And when, or if, the time is right for you, you have the choice to use exercise as a tool to aid in your self-care. Have you ever had to take a conscious break from exercise?
Recharging my spoons with this nutritious breakfast. This mishmash includes vanilla yogurt 🌸🐄, sliced bananas 🍌, strawberries 🍓, blueberries 🔵, raspberries ♥️, honey granola 🍯🌾, and dark chocolate chips🍫. Yesterday was a pretty spoon demanding day. I started with helping my professor and some grad students collect data on a study regarding food waste in elementary school lunches. I was warned that it will be like herding cats, and the noise made me reminisce... on how much I don’t miss elementary school. One of the grad students even mentioned the possibility of bringing earplugs next time. After that I went to lunch with my parents and sister, then went to Kate Spade to buy handbags to celebrate getting through the semester ♠️👜💕. After that, I had an optometry appointment to renew my prescription and replace my glasses that were stolen. I was hoping for a change in frames, but Costco ran out of the ones I wanted. I got a close replacement to my prior ones, but I was disappointed. I’ll keep an eye out for the ones I wanted initially. After that, I watched the Warriors game at a local bar. No game 5. Yay. Now I’m going to unwind a bit today. Tend to some things I forgot about during finals week, waste time on social media, and maybe restart a blog. Then later this week, it’s back to data collecting. #breakfast#yogurtparfait#banana#strawberry#blueberry#raspberry#granola#chocolatechips#edrecovery#eatingdisorderrecovery#asd#autism#pcos#pcoswarrior#endometriosis#endowarrior#chronicillness#spoonie#chronicpain#nourishnotpunish#balancednotclean
NEW YOUTUBE VIDEO! Eating DOUBLE the recommended serving sizes for a day - the link is in my bio! 😎 I ate double the recommended serving sizes! This video was inspired by Grackle's video: @gracebooth97 I LOVE GRACE SHE IS SO AWESOME! But I thought it would be fun to eat double the serving sizes, as it also helps me in my anorexia recovery. It was awesome, and challenging at times but as I recover it just further reminded me that serving sizes are ridiculous (especially for cereal). After living with an eating disorder for so long, it is important to remember that you don't need to follow suggested serving sizes - just eat what you want and how much you want! What do you think is the most shocking serving size?
Friendly reminder: you can’t pour from an empty cup ☕️⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Do you ever find yourself totally burnt out and overextended from trying to please people?⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ What would it be like to extend yourself the same kindness that you extend to others?⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ If no one has told you already today, you’re worth it boo ❤️⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 📸: @alex_elle
MENTALITY AND PERSPECTIVE IS KEY to results Whether you are indeed in a diet or not, your mentality should ALWAYS be a priority. The words you use with yourself do have a major impact in how you feel and consequently act. How many times you promised yourself “not to have sugar for 30 days” “not to eat carbs for x days” “not to have chocolate..” etc.. every time you forbid yourself something, your mind plays you tricks so that the desire for it increases - this in psychology is called “Reactant” and yields the “ Forbidden fruit effect”. Try to change the words you use with yourself and recognize that it is about A CHOICE and NOT A DEMAND. “I choose to eat a nutrient dense meal because I know it will keep me satiated for longer” and not “I cannot have a pizza because it will make me gain weight”. Whenever you choose: I HAVE TO do X, I CANNOT do Y, you are tiring your willpower - which will one day burst. This is the power of the mind when it comes to anything - the more you do things for OTHERS, the more you feel that you are being obliged, the less willing you will be to make changes. Do not expect to change a habit you built over a long period of time in 1 day, 1 week or 1 month. Commit to something you truly want as if you had a LIFETIME commitment - Persist, insist but never surrender. Being successful in life is often not being perfect, is about being consistent. It’s about CHOICES NOT obligations . . . #mindsetquotes#iifym#flexibledieting#dietaflexivel#motivationalquoteoftheday#fitnessportugal#healthypancakes#sagafitpt#macrocounting#intuitiveeating#intuitiveeatingjourney#eatclean#igftiness#fitnesslife#fitfam#fitspo#strengthfeed#bbggirls#fatlossplan#losingweight#dietingtips#hottogetstrong#nutritiontips#diettips#healthyrecipe#balancednotclean#juntossomosmaisfit #eusouwh#nourishnotpunish#healthynothungry
𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘮𝘺 𝘨𝘰𝘢𝘭. That's what one of my clients said on a recent coaching call. Can you relate to feeling a similar way? Graduation season is upon us, June is right around the corner, cookout and bathing suit season is rapidly approaching, and you might be thinking, "shit, I guess I'm not getting to my goal this year either...what's the point!?" ** 𝘛𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘶𝘱 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴 ** If you can relate, I want to tell you something similar to what I told my 1:1 rockstar: 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐠𝐨𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐁𝐒 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐭. ▪️Maybe it isn't sustainable to lose 20# by that big event you have coming up in a few months, but taking action, losing 10# and gaining confidence is better than staying stuck where you are now. ▪️Maybe that indulgent holiday weekend did set your progress back a little bit, but taking action, wiping the slate clean and moving closer toward your goals is better than giving up and sliding backwards. ▪️Maybe your goal weight still feels r e a l l y far away, but taking action NOW toward the healthy habits that will get you there is the only way to ensure your success in the future. And while those successes might not feel as shiny as what you originally had in mind, aren't they all better than staying stuck where you are now? 🙌🏼 𝐇 𝐞 𝐥 𝐥 𝐘 𝐄 𝐒 🙌🏼 If you're tired of waiting for the perfect time,
Out of your element doesn’t have to = off the rails. 🚂🍟🍕🍦🍹🍰🍫🍩🍪 Summer is around the corner, along with all the camping trips, vacations, weddings, patio drinks & BBQ's that come with it. So how do you enjoy everything summer has to offer without destroying all your progress? 👇👇👇 ▪️Be prepared. → No, you don't need to bring pre-prepped, pre-weighed Tupperware containers with you everywhere you go - but a little preparation goes a long way. Bring along healthier snacks & calorie-friendly hot dogs on your camping trip; Eat lighter on the days you know you'll be eating a large meal; Have a protein bar in your purse in case there aren't any healthy options available; etc. ▪️Remember that it's not all about the food (/drinks). → Yes, food & drinks are a part of every single social culture... But they aren't everything! At the end of the day, you're going to remember the conversations and experiences you had, not whether you ate a salad instead of a burger or a vodka water instead of a margerita. ▪️Pick your battles. → One meal or day of overeating won't derail your progress long-term, but if it's happening every other day or every single weekend, it will. Ask yourself if that slice of cake or sugary cocktail is ACTUALLY going to add joy to your experience, or if you could enjoy it just as much with a lower-calorie alternative (& if the answer is yes, that's totally fine! just don't make it the default EVERY single time). ❓What do you struggle with most food & drink-related around this time of year? Comment below & I'd love to help where I can! 🤗
Body love is great. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ And it's exciting and promising. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ But it's really hard to love your body in a culture that tells us we are wrong, we are flawed, and that we need to change. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ It's hard to love a culturally unacceptable body. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ This is why individual is important and healing, but to really change our world and make the planet safe for all bodies, we must radically change the culture. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ We need a culture without a hierarchy of good bodies, ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ good skin, good hair. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The reasons we have these are so, so, so flawed and so, so, so wrong. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ We can't just carve out a place for ourselves, ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ we need to make the need to carve that place irrelevant.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Radically changing the culture is hard. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Not everyone has the energy or spoons to do it. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ But those of us that do, including the "thin allies", need to push and push and push for change. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Radical social justice has to be part of this work, at least for me. I need a culture that doesn't have a time limit, or size limit, or darkness limit on bodies. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ So I'm going to keep pushing for that change. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Are you in? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ #haes#healthateverysize#intuitiveeating#fatacceptance#fatactivism#bodyliberation#intuitiveeatingrd#fatpositiverd#edrd#haesrd#pnwdietitian#fatdietitian#plussizerd#prospernutrition#bellinghamrd#losehatenotweight#riotsnotdiets#socialjustice#radicalselflove#nourishnotpunish#antidiet#nondiet#edrecovery#dietculture
Today I want to share a piece of my journey and why this account is necessary (for me). In 2015 I was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, POTS, and Chronic Daily Headache. These diagnosis came after many years of suffering and over two years unable to work. Like many people i associated thinness with health. I had never been taught otherwise nor did I have any role models to the contrary at the time. When I began my “health journey” I thought to myself “what’s the worst that can happen?” Over a relatively short period of time I lost over 75lbs. My hair started falling out by the fist full and I lost my menstrual cycle. I didn’t know it at the time but I developed orthorexia, an exercise addiction, and eventually battled with BED and bulimia. I’m telling you this because it’s important you know I’m not just posting photos of food for the hell of it. I’m posting them because for the first time since 3rd grade I don’t hate my body. I don’t constantly seek to change it. I eat what I want when I want to. And I don’t feel the need to justify my food or exercise choices to anyone. I’m finally free to create in the kitchen without feeling afraid to eat it OR feel out of control and binge. As someone who has battled with both chronic illnesses and eating disorders I feel I have a unique view on nutrition, health, and body image. I hope you will follow along with me here and on my other pursuits. Take good care. . . . . . . #chronicillnesslife#invisibleillnesswarrior#cfsme#potssyndrome#migraine#nourishnotpunish#eatingdisorderrecovery#bingeeatingdisorderrecovery#orthorexiarecovery#exerciseaddictionrecovery#fuckdietculture#antidiet#intuitiveeating#haes#bodyneutrality#gainingweightiscool#foodisnottheenemy#effyourbeautystandards#mystory#personal#healthjourney#edjourney
y’all.. tj’s quinoa pesto >>> it sounded weird to me at first, but that TASTE oh man. it is also not too creamy so having some doesn’t hurt my lactose intolerant tum😋 did anyone watch the bachelorette last night? i CANNOT with luke p. or cam. who falls for someone in 48 hours?!?! ok rant over. i have a fun 12 hour day of busyness on campus and i’m just waiiiiiiiting for the day to be over!!! have a good tuesday friends😚 • #pasta details~ @explorecuisine green lentil pasta topped with tj’s quinoa pesto + broccoli🥦
•TW‼️• So everything‘s been going pretty much downhill lately. I‘m stressed all the time because of my exams. I can barely study because of what’s going on inside my brain. And stress makes it so much worse. I feel guilty because I don’t study as much as I wanted to. I absolutely hate oral exams and it freaks me out. My eating disorder‘s getting worse from day to day. It’s hard to fight against my depression at the moment. I have a constant need to cry but it feels like there are no tears left. And this is so frustrating. I need something to vent, everything’s just too much. It’s like I’m not really here, not fictioning, and the numbness takes over. All I want to do is to disappear for a while. Don’t get me wrong, I want to live, I want to get better, but I just need a break. I am exhausted and disappointed in myself. •TW end• But I‘ll fight against all of this. I know that I can and that there will be better days. You have to forgive yourself in order to grow. And it always seems impossible until it’s done. Never give up guys. We got this💜 I‘m so sorry that my recent posts have been so negative, there are going to be more positive ones soon, I promise❣️
Being real about things 🤷🏽♀️.... am I still trying... like as hard as I could be? Idk. Most days I think my face is too hideous to be presentable. Most days I don’t have the motivation or energy to leave the house. My sleep is sooo out of whack. But I still try to eat, I still try to get up and do something, I still plan to do things. Elpis lifts my mood 🐱💕 and I love her so so so so so much! From the outside it might seem like not much has changed... but I haven’t self harmed in... well, I don’t even remember. I have no plans to kill myself, I’m still willing to stick out the semester 🤞🏼 each day does feel like a failure and I know i feel hopeless more often than not, but I still get up each day with the intention to do uni stuff/ organise something etc. wow... this post is turning out to be more positive than I thought it would 😅 lol what!? I think each day it is easy to kind of push through, but as soon as I start to recognise how crappy things are regarding my eating and quality of life in general I feel like shit. I think I feel a bit scared. I don’t want to be in my 30s, 40s, 50s still struggling like this!!! Does that outweigh my fear of gaining weight? Why am I so fkn scared of it!? Why do I still seem to think that I can live a full life and not gain any weight? 😒 it clearly hasn’t worked in the years since I’ve left school.... ugh sorry for my sleep deprived rant 😘 and random picture 👹 . . . . . #anorexiarecovery#eatittobeatit#edsoldier#recoveryispossible#recoveringaussies#nourishtoflourish#nourishnotpunish#anorexianervosarecovery#recoveryisworthit#realrecovery#againstana#edwontwin#strongnotskinny#edfam#edcommunity#mentalhealth#prorecovery#anorexia#edwarrior#eatingdisorder#eatingdisorderawareness#anxiety#depression#mentalhealthrecovery#edfighter
Flowers and seeing the changes in my garden make me smile from ear to ear! I feel a warmth in my heart that 'I did that!'. It makes me feel good that I am learning to take care of living things including myself. I hope you are able to find something that makes you smile today! Foodwise, I've been struggling but on the upside I am no where near as bad as I used to be. For that I am so grateful. I keep trying. I have to remember not to put that perfectionism on my meal plan and expect myself to eat everything perfectly. I believe it's a process. The fact that I am still trying, still trying new things, still have eating in my life, says a lot. We are trying the best we can. Sometimes there are ups and sometimes there are downs. Currently, I am not caught in a spiral of behaviors that will take me to a dangerous place. Is my eating on target? By no means but is is better, 10000% better than where I started and that makes me smile. I am honest with my team and thus, the feedback helps me tremendously. I am still on track. I hope that you are able to recognize your progress as well. Every now and then it is helpful to look back at where you were and see where you are now. And you will continue to progress in recovery. We are all individuals so we progress at different rates as we have different life circumstances and different life stressors. Don't fall into the trap of comparing your recovery to someone else's. Focus on your positives. We each grow and blossom in different ways just like the flowers in my garden which teach me so much about life. Your recovery is valid. Be proud of your progress! ~Paisley Rose [photo: succulent from my garden] . . . . . . . . . . #recoverywin#strongerthanyesterday#progressnotperfection#processoverperfection#recoveryisaprocess#recoveryisntlinear#recovertolive#edrecovery#eatingdisorderrecovery#disorderedeating#mentalhealth#endthestigma#bulimia#bulimiarecovery#anorexia#anorexiafighter#anorexiarecovery
Dinner after a loooong day! Stir fry thing with chicken and vegetables👌 So tired tonight... a 5 hour math exam is really something that can make one exhausted😅 BUT that exam was my last written exam now I only have 3 oral exams to go and then I am done!🙌 Enjoy your evening guys!❤
'Just be yourself, be the imperfect, quirky, flawed, weird, beautiful and magical person that you truly are!' ❤️❤️❤️ #goingtoeatwhatiwantto#recoveryispossible#recovery#prorecovery#recoveryistheonlyoption#countblessingsnotcalories#curvesnotcalories#curvesnotbones#healthynothungry#determined#anorexic#eatingdisorderrecovery#edfighter#edsoldier#fighter#nevergiveup#nomoreanorexia#nourishnotpunish#strongnotskinny#charversesana#edcommunity#eatclean#cleaneating#edfamily#realrecovery#f4f#recoverywin#eatittobeatit#fuckana#gainingweightiscool
I’ve never wanted to do anything more than run. I swam competitively for seven years, alpine skied for six. Tried triathlons, cross-country skiing, and biking. Nothing came close. In high-school I did the minimum to get an “A” and focused on getting an athletic scholarship. I selected my college major randomly when I applied. Didn’t care about academics, just wanted to run NCAA division one. All of my relationships (until I met my fiancé) were with runners. It was easier that way, they understood what the training took. I met my best friend in college. She was also on the cross-country team. I had back to back stress fractures that year. She tore her hamstring off her bone. When I found out about the second fracture she sat with me on our dorm room floor. We both cried. She understood what it meant. I always wanted to be a runner. Four stress fractures. Five bouts of tendonitis. Piriformis syndrome x2. Anemia. Bulimia. Anorexia. Through it all, I wanted to be a runner. I won’t ever be able to fully express what it means to me. Running is ingrained in every fibre of my being. It has been a constant. A challenge. A teacher. A friend. Some may think it’s immature, exaggerated, or that I’m romanticizing it. I just think I’m tremendously lucky. Find the thing that makes you tick. The thing that makes you feel alive. The thing you want to BE there for. This is recovery.
I know #momguilt is all cool and gets its own hashtag, but that doesn’t make it any less harmful than the other types of guilt we live under. Feeding your kids (no matter how old they are) doesn’t need to be another source of guilt. It doesn’t need to be a battle ground either. . On Tonight’s live Grace Fueled Chat I’m talking with fellow RD and momma Breanna Dale from @soulful__nutrition about baby led weaning and feeding our kids (of all ages) from an #intuitiveeating framework with a heavy dose of #grace. Click the link in my bio to join live at 7 pm CST and ask questions!